Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Informal Cow Chips

We all have moments where we face indecision. At times our thoughts begin to run together like watercolors and before long, we're thinking, "hey, my head is feeling cluttered. I can't make up my mind to make up my mind!" My remedy to get my brain and my conscience to follow through with any particular task or a plan, is to seek out a second opinion. I've named my second opinion, Matt, aka S.L.O. (Second Loving Opinion). Whenever my brain's operator hits a cement block, I seek my S.L.O. We then find ourselves in another roundabout conversation together, which goes something like this:
 I may begin with, "Honey, should I...?"
 His reply: "I don't know. What should YOU do?" 
Later that week... "Love, what do you think about...?" 
His reply: "I don't know. What do YOU think?"
And once more, "Hmmm. Mmmm, Matt? Would it be good to do... or better to do... OR best to do...?" 
His reply: "I don't know. YOU do what YOU think. Do what YOU want. Do what YOU need. Just do what you gotta do."

When my ability to decide gets choked, I find myself needing my S.L.O. to remind me to loosen that grip I have on myself just a little more. It takes just one jam, and all of a sudden I'm making the decision to pass my decision-making onto someone that shouldn't have anything to do with my next plan of action, unless it involves others, of course. However, Matt's stoic and consistent replies always leaves me no choice but to make every last decision for myself... Which is ultimately helping to grow my independence... Which is consequently building my purposefulness... Which is increasing my self-awareness... Which is what I'm aspiring to be most in touch with!
So, my question: Is it just me, or are there a slew of dithering females out there who also have a diabolical obsession to get their patriarch's to make up their mind for them? Who just HAVE to have that S.L.O.? 
I'm just grateful that in the end, I'm faced with no other choice but to make up my own darn mind. If I'm going to experience my life to it's full potential, why not do it while making up my own mind? Thanks, Matt. I think I am cured of ambiguity... but what do YOU think?

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